I knew a girl in college who was always cheerful,
had a great sense of humor, and was perfectly
nice. But her room, though well decorated and
full of that Feng Shui crap, had an odd stink to
it. Behind her back, my friends and I cracked
plenty of jokes at the expense of her malodorous
But we were all wondering to ourselves whether
our own rooms came with their own "special" odors
that we didn't know about. Your room might not
smell like a Sumo wrestler just went to the
bathroom after a Mexican food buffet. But it may
have an unexplainable odor that, much like bad
breath or B.O., can go undetected by the very
person that lives with it (i.e., you.)
So what could that putrid smell be? Does it come
from the pile of unwashed laundry in the corner
of the room? The sweaty shoes sprawled on the
ground? The stale smoke from the cigarettes you
smoked last night? Perhaps it's the dead bird
under the bed. Whatever the case, it must go
There are plenty of simple ways to keep your room
smelling good, and they all have to do with being
clean. Do your laundry and make sure it's
completely dry before you put it away. Wash your
sheets and towels on a regular basis. Don't smoke
in your room. Always wear socks or use odor
eaters in your athletic shoes or keep them in the
hall. Don't keep any open food or food that has
gone bad in your room. Empty your wastebaskets
regularly. Take showers often. And just don't be
a damn slob!
If that's too hard, there are other means of
masking the stench from your workout clothes
dangling from a hanger behind your door.
Use scented candles. They work wonders. There's a
wide variety available, from the cheap kinds that
you can get at your local Rite-Aid to the fancy
ones with scents like Grandma's Blueberry Muffins
or French Mountain in Fresh Rain and are only
sold at specialty boutique places. Whatever the
case, candles are a popular ?and effective ?
Heat cinnamon in an oven (or toaster, for those
of you non-kitchen people) and leave the door
open. The good smells will invade your room.
Obviously, this is only a good solution if you're
a fan of the cinnamon smell. The aroma can be
nice, and hey, it's better than the scent of wet
Vacuum with carpet cleaner. Believe it or not,
carpets can stink, and vacuuming alone does
nothing for your rug's odor. Carpet cleaners are
more than abundant, as a trip to your local Super
K-Mart would reveal.
Open some windows. It's amazing what good old
fresh air can do to a room.
Put some pieces of apple in a particularly
troublesome area. I know the thought of placing
two slices of the apple from the dining hall next
to your pile of dirty laundry may seem odd. But
after a couple days, the slices will have dried
out and turn brown, and the stale, smelly air
will be filled with the fresh scent of apples.
Unbelievably, it works.
Whoever lives in your room next year can deal
with the dead bird.